They do not miss a chance to kick us while we are down, those Continentals. It is why the British have the greater reputation as sportsmen.
Even now as the Great British striker rolls on the pitch, wounded square between the inner thighs by his own team mate, do the Europeans kick the ball out of play? Or do they rush the Great British goal mouth desperate for an unfair advantage in this most unequal of contests?
It is to be expected of course, this failure of Brussels to act like sportsmen. They will take any opportunity to undermine Brexit. They could simply alleviate the problems the Brexit deal imposed on the United Kingdom has caused. They could encourage HGV drivers back to Kent. The lorry fields, with their barbed wire, machine gun nests, and 50ft high posters of the Home Secretary stand waiting to welcome them back. Did we treat them too well last Christmas? Do they now assume the British lion is a domesticated pussy?
As with all things Brexit the Europeans make the mistake of believing the Great British public needs them more than they need us. It is time to show them, once and for all, who is boss!
It is well past time to use British sovereignty to demand the world bends to our will. We must invoke the sternest of tantrums on their doorstep and demand they slash EU HGV driver pay to far below British levels. This will not only see the drivers rush back for the mighty pound. To once again shove the Queen’s face into their pocket. It will also help keep inflation low in British shops. Which is to the benefit of Europeans as they flock to catch winter sun on British beaches.
We will of course extend the temporary hand of friendship to assist them in our hour of need.
Their eager truckers will face a less rigorous immigration regime as they arrive at our border. We will only incorrectly intern some of them as an example to others.
But domestic voters in the U.K. need not worry that we will return to the sour days of fellowship and a sense of family across our entire continent. Once we have trained sufficient domestic drivers we will tell the Europeans to piss off again. And they will accept all this because we are British.
