The EU’s failure to build a trade boat allows Britannia to once again rule the waves of trade

They just do not understand modern trade across The English Channel. The so called largest trading bloc on Earth is moribund in the trade fads of the 21st Century. Clearly this is to be encouraged to make a success of Brexit.

Let them have their endless, boring Xoom calls. Let them tire even the most willing with never ceasing prattling about market size, productivity and level playing fields. Brexitannia can slip out the back unawares and sail into port. While we dock in the bustling markets of the new world the EU will be too busy agreeing mutually beneficial pacts to see our hare race ahead of their tortoise.

Nothing shows the vision of Great Britannia unchained better than a boat. Not just any boat. A big boat. A big boat on which the Prime Minister and his former mistress can sail the seven seas with a select clique to wow the far flung markets just itching for access to London’s laundromats.

While the EU dulls other major economies into stupor, in league with Woke King Biden and alignment on corporate tax, we will be sealing radical tariff reductions on sandwich spreads and GM powered mince. They won’t even notice. Too busy working out how to insert the batteries into electric cars and extending rights to workers too work shy to notice they even have them.

What use Macron or Merkel wondering if their video feed is working when Mr Johnson is extending his arms from the prow of the new Royal Yacht to welcome donations in any currency?

Just imagine yourself standing with empty hands on the dock of a new world outpost and seeing Boris and Carrie arrive to bring you contemporary British culture? No Belgian yoghurt can compete. No French cheese carries such a whiff.

The EU and New York can have our dull old financial services. Mr Johnson will be three sheets to the wind on his yacht any anyone with a bag of roubles will know it.

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